Improving your body image takes a lot of work
But don’t let that deter you, because it is absolutely worth it! The work is important and doable! Here are some tips, in no particular order, on ways you can work towards improving your body image, in addition to the reflective inner work needed.
1. Curate your social media
Sure, it would probably be better for all of us if we were off social media entirely, but we live in a world where social media may be necessary for business or personal reasons. If you’ve got to be on social media, be sure to carefully curate what’s on your feed. Unfollow individuals, companies, or influencers who are heavily entrenched in diet or “wellness” culture and start following fabulous fat folks and people who are anti-diet or Health At Every Size (HAES) practitioners. This is also a great opportunity to follow a more diverse set of people all around, so that you’re more often exposed to the voices of disabled folks, queer folks, Black folks, and folks in other marginalized communities. So much of our feelings about our bodies and our worth come from what we see in the media, but we’re adults now, and we get to decide the media we expose ourselves to.
2. Take more pictures of yourself and ditch the filters
When we’re uncomfortable with how we look, especially if we’re comparing ourselves to others or a past version of ourself (perhaps pre-kids), it can be easy to shy away from photos, whether that’s having our photos taken or taking pictures of ourselves, but one of the best ways to normalize our bodies to our own brains is to see more of our bodies! So take more pictures of yourself. Resist the urge to apply those snapchat filters! Resist the urge to only take pictures of yourself from the neck up. Get your whole dang torso in there. Have other folks take photos of you (like me for instance)! Give yourself permission to be in the photo, and then get on in there! You are worthy of being documented exactly as you are right now.
3. Explore body neutrality
If body love and body acceptance seem a little out of reach from where you’re starting, why not explore body neutrality? Body neutrality is the concept of simply accepting that your body exists, that it’s worth of respect and care right now, whether or not you love it in this very moment. Body neutrality can be a very freeing practice, but it’s a critical step in the journey to improve your body image. You won’t love your body every minute of every day, and that’s okay. What you can do, is accept that your body exists, and treat it with respect and kindness in each moment, and allow your body to simply be.
4. Get some tattoos
No seriously. Tattoos are an amazing way to adorn your body in a way that feels special and helps you have positive feelings towards specific parts of your body. I used to struggle to love my thighs, but an unexpected bonus of getting thigh tattoos was that the second my tattoos had healed up, I suddenly found a new appreciation for my own thighs as the works of art they are! Find a tattoo artist you love, save the money if you have to, and get yourself a sparkly new tattoo to help you love specific areas of your body that deserve your care.
5. Buy clothes that fit you
This one sounds so simple, but because of our size obsessed culture, it can actually be pretty traumatic to admit that your clothing sizes have changed, so we stuff ourselves into clothes that are uncomfortable and are literally hurting us so that we don’t have to change clothing sizes. Were we “just more comfortable” when we weighed less, or were we physically more comfortable then because our clothes fit better? We often think loving our body comes first, and then we will treat our body with care and respect, but actually, treating our body with the care and respect it deserves helps us learn to love our bodies. So one of the first things you can do to have a better relationship with your body is to make sure you’re not hurting it by stuffing it into clothing that is too small. Let that tum be free and stop holding onto clothing that no longer serves you.
6. Get rid of your scale
Yeah… I know how hard this one is. If you’re anything like me, you spent way too much time congratulating yourself anytime the scale went down and berating yourself anytime the scale went up. But your worth isn’t defined by a number on the scale, and you don’t have decide whether you’re having a good or bad day based on such an arbitrary measurement. Unless there is a medical reason (a real one, not just being in a larger body) for you to know what you weigh on a regular basis, get rid of your scale completely, and just adjust clothing sizes based on fit as needed. Free yourself from the scale’s tyranny and start living your life without worrying about what the scale has to say about it!
7. Institute a zero tolerance policy about negative self talk
Whether that’s from yourself, your spouse, or your friends and family. When you catch yourself speaking negatively about your own body, try to replace negative self talk with neutral phrases about your body. When others around you are speaking negatively about their bodies (since this is apparently how some of us bond), don’t engage, change the subject, or set a boundary that you’d prefer not to hear negative self talk or diet talk from your friends and family when you’re together. Sometimes folks may have a difficult time with these boundaries, so be prepared to be kind but firm. This is one of the hardest habits to break, and one of the hardest boundaries to set with body image, because of how pervasive complaining about our bodies is, but with practice, it does get easier and becomes more of a reflex, which supports an overall better body image.
I hope these tips help you, and if you have any others you’d like to share, leave them in the comments below!
—Sam
